I Have Anxiety
September 3, 2019
God lately I feel like lately I just hate my life. I feel like a tomato that is about to burst and I can't pin point the reason why. I think it is because everything in my life is going wrong and I have no one to express my emotions to because I don't have friends or talk to anyone.
1. My software company is in the rocks right now. Instagram just changed their logarithm and my developer and I can't figure a way round the logarithm
2. My gasoline app has not launched yet.
3. I can't list products on amazon to sell anything.
4. I stop talking to Nishma
I feel like I am about to explode and I don't know what to do.
There were only 2 positive things that is happening in my life right now.
1. I reconnected created a dream board with one of my best friends from high school
2. I apologized to my ex-fiance
I went back to Houston this weekend to visit my bestfriend from high school. We ended up creating a dream board for our life and created a plan to execute. We went out Friday night and I told her that I reached out to my ex-fiance to apologize for cheating on him. I was taken back from his response. For some reason, I expected him to be angry at me still, but he actually apologized for pushing me to getting married to him.
I was really taken back by this because I just realized that my ex-fiance was a really nice person and I feel really bad for what I did.
It also made me realize that Colin was a really shitty person. Compared to my ex-fiance, Colin would have never apologized to me even if he was wrong.
I don't think it would ever worked out with Colin if things were to go how I wanted it to go. He didn't have a pure heart and that is something that I look for in a partner.