Am I Delusional or in Love? I Think I am Delusional
December 20, 2017
Yesterday was a great day. I had the chance to see Colin. I haven’t saw him in 2 or 3 months and it just felt so good to see him and hug him. My heart jumps every time I see him. Usually when I see him I can’t even think or talk properly, but this time it was different. I feel less crazy, but more cozy? I am not sure if my feels for him is less intense or if I just feel comfortable with him.
Yesterday was the first time we told each other we miss each other in the 4 years we knew each other. The best part about this is that we were both sober.
The conversation went somewhat like this after we had sex:
We were cuddling- He was the big spoon this time and I was the Colin
Me- I miss you..
Colin- You do?
Me- Don’t get too happy, I only miss you 1% out of 100
Colin- At least I am in the game
Me- Yeah, sadly I am not
Colin- I miss you ½ a percent
Every time he shows me affection I just replay it over and over in my head all the time and I can’t help but to smile. I think I am going crazy again.
Today I also decided which direction I want to take this book. I am going to enter journal entries instead of just focusing on real estate topics. I enjoy researching real estates, but I enjoy incorporating my thoughts and views on topics outside of real estate. It would be funny to read back on and hopefully one day when I have children I can give them this book to read so that they can learn and laugh at my mistakes..