Life Tip: Don't be desperate
January 9, 2017
It has been a crazy, emotional roller-coaster for the past few days. My heart felt so anxious and emotional I couldn’t get myself to do anything but to sleep, read and watch YouTube videos.
I think it is because I started on my period and that Colin hasn’t talk to me. For some reason, I feel really anxious when I don’t talk to him for more than a week.
Not only that, my company I work for announced that this year revenue greatly declined and they just fired 70 people last week.
That definitely did not help my anxiety..
Plus, one of my tenants is paying rent late again. I am fed up with this. Not only did she not give me the deposit, she is paying rent late. I talked to my attorney and he advised to either ask her to make monthly payments or to ask her parents to cosign the lease.
She agreed to make monthly payments, so I would need to terminate her initial lease and create a new one.
Ughh.. I knew from the start to not let her move in, but I felt bad because she didn’t have a place to stay and I was desperate to get a tenant to fill the room because I didn’t want to pay my mortgage.
Lesson #2: Don’t be desperate.
Anyways, last weekend I decided to run a half marathon. It was always one of my goals, so I might as well do it now since I am still young.
I felt better today because I decided to go to the park and run 2 miles. I think I need to start running everyday to keep me mentally sane, especially when I am on my period.
Sometimes, I feel like I like Colin too much. Sometimes I feel like I love him. It literally drives me insane. The worst part is that he is going on his world tour in a few months and I won’t even see him for a year or two. I think it is best for me to distant myself, but I go crazy when I do that.
Ugh. Fuck it. I am too good for him anyways. I accomplish so much more than him when he was 22 and he is just an average Joe. What I hate most is that I let someone average drive me crazy!
Good night world. It is just one of those days..